No, not the Burger King hamburger. I’m talking about the candy kind of Whoppers; you know, chocolate on the outside, and that always-mysterious ingredient, malted milk, on the inside. I used the Easter egg kind, because they were on sale.
Just put some whoppers into your mug.
Then pour really hot coffee over it. It needs to be hot enough to melt those suckers.
Yes yes I know, it looks like poo. But just keep stirring until they’re mostly melted. You can get through this.
Eventually it is a nice dark, textured chocolaty drink.
It tastes like mocha coffee with a hint of the caramel-ish malt insides. Perhaps last week’s bacon coffee made you nauseous, but I assure you, this actually tastes very good.
You can learn more about the various kinds of Whoppers on Wikipedia:
Oh, hey, do you have suggestions for future installments of Putting Weird Things in Coffee? Send them to suggestions [at] puttingweirdthingsincoffee [dot] com . Let me be your guinea pig.